CIRCLE OF LIFE
BY
MAURA I. KELLY
(SANTA CLARITA, FEBRUARY 1986)

Jefferson Carmichael looked at the old horse with concerned eyes. Blazer's Dream had been a top racer in his prime, but those days were long past. Now, the thoroughbred was laboring to breathe as he lay in his stall. Jeffers knew it was time the horse was put down but he needed to get permission from the owner. He also needed to talk to his partner and fiancée, Mickey Foley.

He came out of the barn into the sunlight. It was a cold winter day in Placerita Canyon. The Corsello ranch, where Jeffers was working, was nestled into the side of the hills. Those gentle slopes were green at the moment, but Jeffers knew that wouldn't last long. In another month or so the Santa Ana winds would blow through these canyons and turn the beautiful grass dry and brown. Out here, brush fires were an ever-present possibility.

For now though, it was forgeous, and he enjoyed working outside. That was why he and Mickey had chosen to specialize in horses and other large animals. They did take the occasional dog and cat, but their main business was equestrian.

Jeffers reached the truck and pulled out his car phone. He dialed the Equestrian Center and waited for the connection.

"Mickey? It's me."

"What's the prognosis?" she asked him.

"I'm afraid it's time, sweetheart."

He could hear Mickey sigh on the other end. "Okay, Jeff. I'll call Patty and have her come out, but I think she knew already."

"When can you get here, Mick?"

"Soon. I'm just finishing up... 'Bout another forty-five minutes."

"I'll wait for you. Besides, I doubt Patty'll be any sooner."

"True. Well, I'd better call her. See you soon, Slick."

"Okay, hon." Jeffers hung up the phone.

He looked around, wondering what he should do until the two women arrived. He knew Mickey was upset about putting this horse down. Blazer's Dream belonged to Patricia Foley Corsello, Mickey's older sister. Patty had owned the animal since 1962, but Blaze was also special to Mickey. As the two had gotten older, they had owned others, but Blazer's Dream was their first and the one Mickey had learned to ride on. They would always have a soft spot for this particular animal.

Jeffers started to walk back to the barn when he saw a car pull up into the driveway. It was too early for either Mickey or her sister. The old Kharmin Ghia stopped and Jeffers saw Patty's husband get out.

"Jeff, hello," Nick called.

"Hi." Jeffers jogged over and shook the hand Nick extended.

Nick Corsello was a tall man, with black hair and brown eyes. They'd become good friends in the service together, and would soon be brothers-in-law.

"What's up? Is it Blaze?" Nick's distinctive eastern accent was evident when he spoke.

"'Fraid so. Mickey's calling Patty now. What're you doing here? I thought you were up north?"

"I got home last night. Patty was worried about her horse so I promised to stay close to home today. I was just at the beach visiting my father."

Nick Corsello was a private detective Patty had hired at Jeffer's suggestion. Patty was a corporate lawyer, but tended to dabble in other areas of law and had needed Nick's help. Since then, Patty and Nick had been inseparable and got married last year.

The two seemed very happy and Jeffers realized it was their commitment to each other that had finally prompted him to ask Mickey to marry him. And now, he and his partner would be husband and wife by the end of this year. Already, at least one Foley girl could always be found working on the extravaganza planned at their father's Bel Air mansion. Jeffers was amazed at how much preparation was required for marriage -- and happy he wasn't needed for hardly any of it.

Nick started up the road towards the barn and Jeffers followed. Nick stopped and looked candidly at Jeffers. "It's not gonna be any easier on Michelle either, ya know."

Jeffers sighed in agreement. "Mick loves that horse almost as much as Patty does."

"You'll do it?"

"I'll offer... but knowing Mickey, she'll want to do it herself."

The men headed into the barn to wait.

* * *

It was a half hour later when Patty drove in, followed immediately by a van with the logo, Foley and Carmichael, D.V.M. Mickey climbed down and watched as her sister maneuvered herself out of the car. Patty's long, reddish brown hair nearly got caught as she closed the door. Six months pregnant, she was just beginning to have problems moving as gracefully as she usually did. A more diminutive 5'6", Mickey had always envied her older sister's 6' stature and long legs.

"Hi, Sis."

"Hi, Mickey."

Mickey joined her sister near her car.

"Sorry we've got to meet for this."

Patty threw an arm consolingly about her sister's shoulders. "I don't want him to suffer anymore."

"Hey, I'm supposed to cheer you up."

"Blaze is special to both of us."

Mickey looked at her sister, realizing she was stalling, but neither really had any desire to face what had to be done. "Jeff's probably inside."

"I know," Patty answered wistfully

* * *

When they walked into the barn, Mickey was pleasantly surprised to see Nick there. She knew Patty would be glad to have her husband around and Mickey had liked Nick Corsello the first time Jeffers had introduced them. Maybe it was because he reminded Mickey so much of her father, Nick Foley.

Nick took his wife's hand as they walked into the stall. He helped Patty to kneel down next to the old horse.

"Oh, Blaze," Patty whispered, tears of anguish evident in her voice.

Mickey looked down at the horse sadly. What they were going to do was the best thing for the animal, but it didn't make the act any easier. She heard Jeff come up beside her and knew what he carried in his hands without even having to turn and look around. They'd both done this many times before, but for Mickey it had never been this close to home. She sighed once, watching as Patty positioned herself near Blaze's head. Nick sat behind her, his arms protectively encircling her. She then turned away from the tender scene near Blaze and looked at Jeffers.

"I'll do it, Jeff."

"Are you sure, Mick?"

"Yes, I'm sure. He's my horse too."

Jeffers relinquished the hypo to Mickey, knowing when Mickey had decided on something, there was no way to change her mind.

Mickey bent down and stroked Blazer's neck, remembering all the hours she and Patty had spent grooming his beautiful coat. The eyes that looked at her as she crouched there were almost blinded by cataracts. She heard Blaze nicker at her close proximity; he always recognized his mistresses.

It only required a few seconds for the injection to take effect. The labored breathing of the old horse slowly subsided into silence. The only sounds heard now in the stall were Patty's quiet sobs and the consoling words of her husband.

Jeffers saw the tears streaming down his fiancée's face, but she didn't make a sound. He felt his own emotions well up at the sight of Mickey crying and he went over and gathered her into his arms. He held her for a few minutes until he felt her gain control. It was always hard to cope with the sorrow of someone you loved. It made him feel so helpless.

* * *

They emerged from the barn into the bright sunlight of the waning afternoon. Patty and Nick walked ahead, arm in arm. Jeffers walked side by side with Mickey.

"I'll take care of the rest."

"Thanks, Jeff. I'd appreciate that."

They were both surprised to hear happy laughter from up ahead of them.

"Mickey," Patty called, "You gotta feel this. He just gave me a powerhouse kick."

"I'll say," Nick added. "My son just scored 3 points, right through the goal posts."

Mickey excitedly joined the couple, basking in their joy.

Jeffers watched his friends as they chattered on about the coming baby. What they had to do a few minutes ago was the hardest part of his job, but nature always seemed to keep the balance. Loss and renewal -- circle.

Jeffers caught up to his friends to celebrate this coming new life.